by: Linda Roy
Music by: ABBA
Lyrics by: Linda Roy
From the Urban Dictionary:
Commando: Not wearing any underpants. “I’m goin’ commando today!”
This is a delicate subject. It’s a little bit TMI, but I trust FnS readers… Some of you parents out there must have gone through it with your kids at some point. You must have! Okay, here’s the thing. My young son “M” has rug burn issues. I mean my gawd, how many pairs of Star Wars Underoos do we have to go through before he finally puts all this…behind him? I’m at my wits rear end, people. He goes through so many pairs that I can’t keep up with the laundry. It gets to where I’m out buying extra packs of skivvies to fill his daily undergarment quota.
Yesterday the drawer was empty.
Without making the brief pilgrimage to Target, I was screwed. I was left with no choice but to tell him he’d need to go commando.
M: What’s commando? Is that like GI Joe?
Me: No hon…it’s when you have to go without underwear.
M: Do they call it that because GI Joe doesn’t wear underwear?
Me: Um…no…I don’t know why it’s got a military name – it just does.
I don’t know what it is about males and their junk, but they seem to like enjoy the freedom aspect because it’s all he could talk about. All. he. could. talk. about.
M: “Hey Dad! I’m goin’ commando!” “Grandma, guess what? I went commando this week!”
“I’m Commando GI M!”
Kind of hampered my hopes that he’d be prompted to keep the Jockeys out of the…hamper.
Linda is a writer/musician with a Peter Pan Petty complex, a guitar toting husband, two boys and pug dependency issues. She’s grateful that the word “snark” has been introduced into the vernacular since people just used to know her as “the chick with the bad attitude”. She feels strangely akin to Larry David and will criticize your parallel parking abilities to prove it. She blogs at elleroy was here, fronts the Indie Americana band Jehova Waitresses and writes for Aiming Low. You can also find her on Twitter and Facebook.