DON’T CLICK SEND!: The 5 Worst Dating Message Mistakes – Mallory Schlossberg

Photo on 5-18-12 at 7.03 PM

I’m a big proponent of the Internet dating scene. Why? You can talk to the opposite sex while looking at animated GIFs, you don’t have to see the guy’s “I’m-rejecting-you-face” when he rejects you, and you can flirt in your sweatpants while eating peanut butter out of the jar! Win, right?

While you may or may not find your soul mate via the Internet, you could very well procure a date or two or thirty seven! It’s important, however, to avoid making these mistakes that I will make for you right now. Us funny ladies usually think that the men are the ones at fault (with their “heYy sexYY LaydEe Lez Do It Now” or their “I want to slather you in my shaving cream and eat organic avocados off of you” messages), but sometimes, we can be at fault, too! We all have our inner creep, let’s not be too proud, here. Since we are just as capable of poor e-flirting, these are the worst messages to send when you are attempting to score a date via the World Wide Web (does anyone call it that anymore? No. No one does. Okay).

Hey!  So, I read your profile, and I also LOVE all of the bands, books, music, movies, and foods you like. We have SO MUCH IN COMMON, it’s almost like we’re related! Except not really haha lol jk. Let’s hang out!

Just a heads up, “it’s almost like we’re related” might be the kicker here.

OMG do I know you in real life?

Ten out of ten times I know what people I know in real life look like, even when I find them on the internet, unless their profile pictures are abstract art in place of a face, in which case most moderators would have taken the pictures down already. [Read more...]

I’ll Stay Here and Guard the Knife Drawer – Fan Letters

by Traci Foust

Nowhere Near Normal: A Memoir of OCD Traci FoustThough it’s been almost a year since the release of my book Nowhere Near Normal a memoir of OCD, the messages I receive from people who have actually read the book still jam up my email at a computer-crashing rate of at least two a month. Most of the responses come from smart, sensitive readers who make me feel worthy of baring my soul—and causing a few members of my family to never speak to me again—into a book that one Goodreads reviewer called “An excruciating long read” about what it was like to grow up with obsessive compulsive disorder.

But every so often I’ll get an email from someone who is angry, crazy and/or telling me the secret to curing my OCD lies within the bulging fibers of his jeans. [Read more...]