Mothers Day 2014 from Caryn Ruby & Drunk Girl – You Dun’ Know…

funny mothers day video

A video to honor all unrecognized mothers from Femur Comedy.

 

PS, I’m over the whole acting drunk shtick thing but this one was actually well written.

4 (More) Web Series to Watch – Party Girl Edition

drunk girls in heels

‘Tis the season! Here are four more web series that were submitted in 2013, all with episodes about partying. To submit your series, email FnS publisher Jacki Schklar with “FnS web series” in the subject line.

Drunk Girls In Heels

Drunk Girls In Heels is a fabulous web series, and also a live show (playing Dec. 5 and 19 in NY). In ep Day Drink Jen is worried about drinking and accomplishing her to do list, but the gals teach her that partying is no hindrance to everyday activities.

Good Intentions

Cynthia had a rough day, so Carmen tries to make her the perfect “bad day cure” drink…with Good Intentions, of course.

Bad Nannies [Read more...]

In Me ~ ManlyMan

insideme1

Hey FnS viewers! We’re ManlyMan. We hope you like our video, “In Me”. We’ve been playing our songs live for a few years now, but this is our first music video and we are so excited to share it with you all. True story, Caitlin really did write a poem called “In Me” in high school without realizing that the phrase made some embarrassing implications, until she read it out loud to her boyfriend. The song is very closely based on this honest work of literary genius. Look out for more from us very soon. We’ve already completed a follow up music video that will be coming out in the next several weeks. Thanks for watching!  - Caitlin and Erin

 

ManlyMan – “In Me” from Coalition Theater on Vimeo.

4 Funny Female-Centric Web Series to Watch – Besties Edition

4 funny web series

You may remember the post 4 Funny Female-Centric Web Series to Watch from last November. Well I hope you are ready for more! Here are 4 more web series sent in by show producers and publicists. These are are 4 of my favorites, I think you will like them, too.

Brunch on Sundays

Brunch on Sundays was submitted by series Writer/Producer/Actor Shira Weitz. Set in Brooklyn every Sunday, a distressed Charlie reveals her ‘sexscapades’ over brunch, her tales enhanced by quirky flashbacks of how they went awry. Charlie’s live-now-ask-questions-later mentality often leaves her with the short end of the stick, but her unwavering confidence keeps her hilarious.

 

 Roomsies


Jenny and Meagan sent this their funnny (with 3 n’s) sketch comedy series Roomsies about two roommates who do weird stuff in their apartment. That pretty much sums it up.

 

Margot & Marie [Read more...]

Sole Provisions FunnynotSlutty.com Short Short Essay Contest

funny-writing-contest

 

Why should you enter the Sole Provisions FunnynotSlutty.com Short Short Essay Contest?!?

 The Prize:

One pair of shoes from Sole Provision’s Fitflops OR Orthaheel collection.

Rules and Writing Criteria:

  1. Essays are to be 150-450 words long to be considered.
  2. You must include one of the following words in the title -  sole, soul or Seoul.
  3. You can write about true events or fiction.
  4. Judging criteria are funniness, good writing and creativity.
  5. Essays will be judged by FnS publisher Jacki Schklar and announced on September 12th.
  6. Essays must be submitted by midnight Eastern on Monday, September 9th 2013. Submit your entry simply by adding it to the comments section below! You can write up to 2 entries/submissions.

Follow Sole Provisions and tell them you appreciate their participation in our contest! https://www.facebook.com/SoleProvisionsShop https://twitter.com/SoleProvisions

 

Wedding Season Workout – Laura Prangley

wedding season workout

Laura Prangley sent us her new sketch, Wedding Season Workout.  The idea was based around the fact that she has caught 13 bouquets at weddings.  It features a ton of hilarious NYC comedians.

 

Yoga Ladies from Up & Down Theatre Co.

 

yoga ladies

I was just in Denver and Boulder for 3 weeks. It was pretty much like this -

YOGA LADIES is a sketch from our satirical musical cabaret, WINNING THE FUTURE.  Up & Down Theatre (Robin Holloway, Kate Chavez, and myself) co-write and perform original sketches and songs that mock contemporary American cultural, economic, and political phenomenon.  This sketch just popped out in rehearsal one day as Kate and I were improvising a scene as Regan-era 80′s uber-capatalist power girlfriends, which somehow evolved into a conversation that very closely resembled the one you see in the sketch.  The imperialism theme emerged through improv, which feels like the greatest gift when trying to write a smart, funny comedy show.  I think this sketch has been among our most successful because we are really making fun of ourselves, and how vain the effort to avoid negatively impacting the planet or fellow human beings can feel as a first-world consumer.  I tried to do a cleanse once; that effort lasted about 30 hours.  I do love yoga though, and beeswax.
- Lindsey Hope Pearlman

http://www.upanddowntheatre.com/

 

What to wear this summer when sitting by the pool and making sure the gardener isn’t stealing – Héléne Bouffant

Hello my little seal skins!

Welcome to summer! I don’t know about you because I make it a rule not to speak to the public, but I cannot wait for swimsuit season. Yes, Héléne Bouffant loves to wear the latest in swimwear paired with a glorious cover up. The less sophisticated among you might consider the dreadfully named “muu muu,” but I urge you to look at some of the wonderful cover up options hitting the runway these days.

SWIM WEAR MUU MUU

No.

Swimwear CU

Yes! See how well this covers her upper arms and collar bone?

I would like to show you some of your options for Summer 2013 swimwear. These are fresh off the runway, pussycats! I dare you to pick just one!

FASHION-BRAZIL-RIO FASHION WEEK-TRIYAHere is a stunning design from this year’s Rio Fashion Week. Look at how seamlessly the designer was able to incorporate long sleeves and metal bars into a single suit. Usually you can only get one or the other. I should warn you, however, that you absolutely must not wear this suit in sunshine. No one enjoys the feeling of burning metal against their bosoms, except for me during a brief experimental period in the 1980′s.

swim wear Mercedes+Benz+Fashion+Week+Swim+2013+Official+xXt6AaQNlC9l Looking for something sexy to wear this summer? How about this liberating one-piece? All you need is two friends to help you get into it and a large bottle of sunscreen. Just think of the tan lines – you shall be the striped tigress of Chili’s or wherever people like you go to eat. [Read more...]

You Poor, Stupid, Sad, Fat Girl by Adrianne Frost

Choking1

 

In the movies and on television, fat girls have it pretty bad. Frankly, fat girls are fucked. End of story. I personally have died twice, as a poor, stupid, sad, fat girl.

The first time I died, it was because my boyfriend was in the Al Qaeda. He was using me to get some kind of Al Qaeda shenanigans going. I had met him on the internet, in an “I like fat chicks” website that my fat friend and I trolled. He thought I discovered his plot and had me killed. The killer was a handsome stranger who flirted with me in a liquor store, whom I followed and, presumably gave a blowjob to in hopes of true love (because that’s what fat girls do), but was strangled and left in a boiler room in Brooklyn instead.

The second time I died, Cuba Gooding, Jr. found me at my job at an elementary school, and he charmed me into meeting him later for dinner by jump starting my car and flashing a toothy grin. He comes to pick me up at my apartment and my roommate tells him that I got freaked out, thinking I wasn’t attractive enough for him and I went off unaccompanied. So, I’m all alone in the bar, looking sad, when the dashing Neil McDonaugh (a time-traveling murderer) sidles up and begins a friendly conversation. I welcome that, because I hardly ever get attention paid to me. I go to the bathroom, Neil follows me, Cuba gets there too late and I get eviscerated. I’m serious. I had a big “Y” cut into my chest. I looked like a bullfrog, in a nice dress, who wandered into a science class.

Dead1

This wasn’t real-life, of course, but two acting jobs I had. I have noticed that this happens with most movies and TV shows: fat girl ends up with not-fat guy because he is using her or she is so desperate that she doesn’t realize he is a serial killer/rapist/puppy eater. Most of these characters are flattered and flustered when a white, physically fit, non-UPS driver pays them any mind. It’s like they’re looking at a work of art that they can never afford. And who would sell it to them, anyway?

Mostly, I get stuck as the 911 operator, patrol-car cop or EMT. You know, the sit down jobs. We can’t run, you know. That’s why you never see us on “The Walking Dead”, we done got ate. Once, I was cast as a lawyer who was not described as “heavyset” in the breakdown. I was just a normal, money hungry, ambulance-chasing attorney representing a killer. It felt progressive. Then, a few years later, I’m in Baton Rouge, getting dissected by a handsome actor. [Read more...]

New Approved Drugs for The Perimenopausal ~ Elizabeth Bastos

vajayawn

The names of the drugs for birth control for women make me want to hurl with their fake happy Disney princessy-ness like names, “Yazmin” or the gettin’ down to business-ness names like “Lo Lo Errin.” And, since I’m perimenopausal and, I shit you not, out of my mind, I have to take something, I suggest the following:

 

Climacteric

Wymmin

Whynnnin

‘Ncryin

NoLubridownthere

Vajayawn

Es-tro-gone

Progestergroany

Chinhair

Crone

Sisterwife

Grandma Moses

Throwthetoasteroutthewindow

Defenestration [Read more...]