Be forewarned, I’m squinting as type this
by Nancy Davis Kho
Sometime over the past few months, and with little fanfare, Nancy Davis Kho’s Near Distance Vision succumbed, after an heroic struggle with degenerative maladies complicated by old age. It was surrounded in its last days by Crow’s Feet, Dry Skin, and Age Spots, and was preceded in death by Flexibility and The Ability to Recall Titles of Movies Viewed Prior to 2008.
To be truthful, Nancy’s Eyesight never was the sharpest. It was in third grade that Nancy’s parents, alarmed by her rampant theatrical squinting at the television screen and chalk board, whisked her off to an eye doctor and had her fitted with their first set of corrective lenses for nearsightedness. They were enclosed in a pair of brown round glasses that a friend of her father’s said “Makes ya look like Mrs. Beasley from Family Affair! Ha ha HA!” You may recall that Mrs. Beasely was a doll, and not a cute one. Nancy may have been nearsighted, but she knew how to recognize an adult douche bag when she met him. [Read more...]